Being Breath

stories from the wilderness of everyday life

Black Friday

It is 9:22 a.m.

I am doing everything I can to keep myself away from ads, promotions, deals, and even friends & family who are pushing to shop today.  (My mom is talking with my kids in the background about what they want for Christmas.  *sigh*)

It isn't that I think buying is bad...heck, it supports our economy.  I could even shop small businesses today and help friends & strangers who are doing exactly what I want to do - make a living through passion.

But today - Black Friday - there is a pervasive energy of grasping.  Clinging.  Wanting.  More.  Different.  New.  I am horribly sensitive to this energy.

I love going to the hobby store or book store and - maybe twice a year - the clothing stores.  I like local, small stores and big chains...all offering things that make my life comfortable and beautiful.  Allow me to repeat - I don't think buying is bad.  But mindless shopping?  Out of control desire?  The justification that appears to buy something when I didn't even know I needed or wanted it before?  THAT tears me apart.

As I type this, I hold a printed out coupon to Borders in my lap.  Part of me says, "it's a book!  Buy a book on how to avoid clinging, a Buddhist book or book on the Yoga Sutras....".  Yeah.  Note the irony.

I want to post something today about the 4.5 mile race yesterday.  About the chaos that was a beautiful Thanksgiving.  About how I'm looking forward to our outing where we get hot chocolate and dance around a farm of trees to pick the one that will sacrifice itself to be the shining center of our home for the next month.

But I look down at the Borders coupon.  In it, I see a mirror reflecting my true self.  And I am reminded once again.

Black Friday: The yearly reminder of how far I must go to overcome grasping.