Being Breath

stories from the wilderness of everyday life

Shed and Experience

My brief reflections on shedding.

My closet and my garage, piled with long-forgotten treasures, are reminders to me of why I chose to start the Shed Project in the first place.  They cough through the dust, crying out to be released from their forced slumber.

Others need them - someone could benefit from that aging photo printer, someone might find such depth in those forgotten books, someone could actually be warmed from the bitter cold by that coat I long ago shoved away, someone else might look stunning in that wedding dress that stores duplicate copies of memories from over 10 years ago.  (But I'm pretty sure that torn shirt, "I'm With Stupid -->" has probably served its purpose.  If it ever had one.  Heh.)

It is selfish of me to cling so tightly.  Being aware of what I trip over and what it means, I am reminded...

There is a calling within me, a force, an energy, that has been awakened.  Once awakened, it cannot be put back to sleep.  I can either choose to do something with it or I can choose to consciously ignore it.  Either way, it is my responsibility to live with the consequences.

As I wrote in the last post, it is challenging enough for me to boldly face my days aware of the delicate richness of life.  Through training or fear, I have accumulated many other challenges in my life - perhaps if only to distract me from the sheer difficulties, chaos, and blinding beauty of the Experience of Life.

And yet, that energy within is aware of that experience now.  It hungers for it - longs for it.  It will not be silenced.

So I consciously make my choices, aware of this immutable passion.  I fight to not sink into judging things as "wrong" or "right".  I simply choose to shed those things that no longer serve me right now.  I am choosing to shed those things that blanket over and mute that energy, those things that convince me to stay in this cage of comfortable, pre-defined reality.  The door is open - I am making the choice to fly out.  I am making the choice to experience what it means to live.

For those who have been following for awhile, you know my practicalities.  You know I have two kids, an established suburban lifestyle, a bank account that nears zero at the end of each month, student loans, a to-do-list that contains far more than I'll ever get done, blessings & stresses galore.  I am not ignoring any of these.  

I am respecting and celebrating where I am in my life and most importantly, not trying to judge it as "bad" and escape from it. As I make the choices that bring me greater experiences in life, they will incorporate those blessings in my life (my children, my husband, my family, our health, stable albeit tight financial means, etc).  I truly appreciate where I am and everyone that has helped me get here.  I am not trying to change for the sake of change; I am changing for the sake of experience.

I will find continue to increase comfort within (through meditation, yoga, art) so that I can increase discomfort in my life (going new places, trying new foods, meeting new people who have different ideas than I do, running that extra mile up that hill, and so on).  I am not only opening myself up to new experiences but also experiencing what is already in my life differently.

And to the energy we put out there, the universe responds.  Tonight I am thrilled to be attending a stop on the Unconventional Book Tour to chat with Chris Guillebeau and Adam Baker (who appears in Chris' most recent book, The Art of Nonconformity, and who I learned lives (or lived?) only an hour north of me!  Find him at ManVsDebt.com).
With hopes that you continue to find new ways to experience life,