Being Breath

stories from the wilderness of everyday life

Blue Moon Buddha

I needed this.

I didn't know it at the time, so there was no to-do list made, no planning.  Just being aware, moment by moment...

I needed space.

We'd cleared the large, brown leather recliner out of the living room for the party a couple of weeks ago - and still haven't put it back.  I needed the space that it left - the physical AND mental space.

I needed reminders.

A last-minute trip to the antique store led me to stumble across a ring I did not intend to buy - a ring that infused me with breath the moment I saw it, a ring that now reminds me daily of that breath and flow.

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I needed time to contemplate.

I've spent a lot of time recently planning and scribbling notes over the direction of my world work.  Like some tangled string I've started to unravel, this contemplative time has actually provided me with insight into how and why I want to create my art.

And so it is.

For the past three days, I've felt enlivened.  In that space where the recliner was now stands an easel, a well-worn cloth tarp, and many paints.  (All removable for those times when my husband or kids feel a bit encroached upon.)

And in that space, there is light.  I can paint during the day with windows open and birds flittering past outside, and during the evening, in the midst of the family's activities. 

In that ring that I wear, there is a priceless reminder.  A reminder that when I get too tense, when I'm sick of where the painting is going or whines about what I prepared for dinner, all I need to do is breathe.  Spacious, life-filled breath, tension-releasing exhale.

And in that contemplation?  Oh, how to even describe it... A connection.  Feeling beyond knowing why I am creating my art, why I am selling it.  Oddly enough, it is for the same reason: I create and sell as part of the practice of awakening.  I create so that I may awaken; I sell so that you may have reminders to do the same.

What I have created was not the purpose, but a fascinating result of finding what I needed.

I am in love with this piece (this peace?) not only because of the piece itself, butbecause of who I was while I  created it.  

Breath, returned to again and again.  Pausing, letting go and painting over, frantic dancing with color, music, silence, delicate lines drawn through the practice of patience, stepping back, stepping in, creating again and again, letting it be.

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Blue Moon Buddha, 24" x "30, acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas

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Pause for a moment - right now - and breathe.  Do what you need to do.

Namaste