I Didn't Want To Write This
10.26.2012 I totally didn't want to write a post about this.
But when I wake in the morning, ready to write...and can't think of anything else? I'll take it as a sign.
Yesterday, I opened up a political discussion on my Facebook page. I have my opinions and will certainly be voting, but I did this more to elicit conversation and to expand my own knowledge. The question I asked was,
"If you have made the choice to do so, why are you voting for Romney? (Note: I asked why are you voting for Romney, not why are you voting against Obama.)"
And the responses have been enlightening. Everyone but my husband has followed the rules of at least staying kind (and yeah, he's making his own dinner tonight), but there is definitely an underlying tension to almost every comment.
And while the issues, the words used are definitely swirling in my head, that isn't what is interesting me most.
What I find most fascinating right now is the tension with me.
(Leaving my political leanings out of this for now, because they certainly aren't the point) I find myself almost angered...no, fully angered, by some of the comments that are left (the viewpoints - not the comments nor the commenters themselves). And my initial instinct is to fight, to challenge, to WIN! These views are wrong, they are harmful, they are ignorant....
I feel burning in my chest, my breath shortens, and my mind starts racing with counterpoints and eloquent-but-harshly-worded responses.
Luckily, I am aware of this burning and of those thoughts. And the part of me that is aware is just shaking her head.
As within me, So in the world.
One Facebook post. Maybe 15 comments - ALL of them stated without hateful language. And I'm tense and pissed off.
If I can't even control my own fearful and angered reactions in this situation, how and why should I expect anyone else, including my elected leader (with all of the bureaucracy and thousands of conflicting opinions coming from all sides), to react any differently?
I can hear all of the responses now: Because that is what they are paid to do, because they are acting on behalf of the greater good, because...frankly, I'm right and they are wrong so of course I'm allowed to be angry.
Shouldn't ALL of our work be to act on behalf of the greater good? (And if you are one who wants to use the "I'm right" argument, I'm afraid I will just offer you a kind smile for now and ask if we can postpone our discussion.)
And yes, the "greater good" is in and of itself a vague term. What I would like to see is conversation focused on that...what is the greater good?
You know what? I'm going down the spiral. I'm getting myself caught up in the conversation of what others can (or should) do...
And I'm leaving this here instead of deleting it so you can see just how easy it is to run away from ourselves.
THAT'S where the focus needs to be if we want anything to change.
Right. Within. You.
Even as I write this, the comments on the post are getting heated up. We ALL have our stomachs in knots and our rebuttals on the tips of our tongues.
And if we want to live in a world where right and wrong is constantly challenged, where an idea can elevate to a war within days, where we remain fully grounded in our animal instincts to fight and defend, then I suppose no more work needs to be done.
But I don't want to live in that world.
So I'll keep using things, such as the political debates, that ignite the fires within me to practice. I'll keep watching my own reactions and the consequences of those reactions. I will practice adjusting those reactions to create more peace within so that I can see more peace around me.
You may say I'm a dreamer. But I'm not the only one.
Take a deep breath with me....
Namaste.
Reader Comments (9)
We do feel heated up. This isn't "my" election...but whatever happens in the US impacts Canada. Always has, always will. So I have a vested, if on the periphery, interest in how this election will end.
Many people (myself included) don't like to give full opinions because the knowledge is there -- someone else is going to be offended by what we think. Or call us out on it. My opinion when that happens...whatever we've said has struck a nerve. A deep nerve. So the rebuttal itself is more a defense mechanism perhaps than an actual belief. With me here?
This sentence, "Shouldn't ALL of our work be to act on behalf of the greater good? " is the one that matters. Because yes, ALL of our work, no matter which party belief we hold (you have Dems and Republicans we have Liberals and Progressive Conservatives...we also have a 3rd party, the New Democratic Party which leans a little more to the left of Liberal)...the main focus must be to act on behalf of the greater good for all.
Which then leads to the removal of the party system and everyone just runs for election on no party platform. That either becomes very socialist in nature...or we have finally reached the nirvana of an ideal world.
You are not the only one.
I don't know if you noticed but fo rthe past few weeks, I have been posting some politcal posts on my FB page. I started doing that in response to the fact that my more "conservative" friends where doing it and I felt like the more Liberal factions were not screaming as loudly and needed my voice with them to get some momentum...
Screaming ? Taking sides ? Politcal ? This is not me ! I was becoming aggressive, angry, drawing lines in the sand, being highly judgmental. This is not me !
I have stopped now. I need to go back to being the example of what I want to see in the world. Tolerant. Loving. Loving in the face of difference. Compassionate. Kind.
A dreamer?
Perhaps.
But I know it is the right way to go. The only way to go.
Plus, now I know, I am not the only one.
Love and light to you, Beautiful Dreamer, and to all of us.
Well said, Lisa!
While I don't think there's much benefit in spewing hateful remarks on Facebook, I'm quite certain there is no benefit to keeping those thoughts bottled up within yourself, either. It wouldn't surprise me at all if you and readers of your blog have a method of meditation that allows you to somehow "vent" all that negative energy into the ether - but for me, I like to take Abraham Lincoln's approach (just yesterday, coincidentally, I had a conversation about this on FB with a certain conservative friend of mine):
Go ahead and say what you want to say. Put it down on paper. Type it into a blog post or social media site. Make a video, drawing, or painting. Write a poem or a song. Now the interesting part. Throw away the letter. Don't post the comment. Delete the video. Burn the drawing or painting. Trash the poem or song.
Interesting, right? You get your thoughts out of your head without risking any friendships. I made up a word for this yesterday: 'Not-posting'. I not-post on my conservative friends' Facebook pages quite often.
OK, now I'll let you in on the reality of this for myself. It's true that I not-post pretty regularly. But sometimes I feel like I've written such a gem that it must be shared. I've regretted that once or twice. And as for those other forms of expression (I like to call them forms of art, but that might be a bit high-minded for some of my creations), I don't destroy them. I just put them away - in a box, a drawer, or a hard drive. Then I can pull them out some time later and reflect on how far - or not - I have come.
Well said Lisa (and Ben). I tend to live with this "internal war" regularly, not just in an election year, because I consider myself a contradiction in the first place. "Liberal Christian". ;-)
There are times when my understanding of the greater good on one topic or another will go against what I know is 'right' based on my religious beliefs. I usually find myself journaling and praying about it, and that helps. Until I'm asked to defend my thinking, or not asked but feel that not speaking up will label me 'more conservative' or 'less Christian'. It is a crazy mixed up world we live in and unfortunately until we do as Sherry said and put All party-lines in the garbage and truly try to work together, I'm honestly not sure that the "big stage" scenery will change.
I too dream of a day when this will happen and am glad to know I'm not alone. Until then, I hope to try and be the light I hope to see in the world and just make sure I am doing what I can to live a safe and secure life with Brad and protect and encourage the ideas and ideals of my girls.
Just so everyone knows, I am responding to each comment individually, via email (as I usually do). I am SO THANKFUL for all of these wise contributions!
Alisha,
There is nothing contradictory about the term "liberal Christian". When you read about the people with whom Jesus interacted, ask yourself whether he was a liberal or a conservative by today's standards. I would argue for the former. Think about inclusive vs. exclusive. Righteous vs. sinners. I could go on and on. And on. But the main point is that religion "belongs" to neither party, although the Republicans have been trying to sell it (successfully, for the most part) for a lot longer.
So don't stress about it. Sounds to me like you're asking the right questions and being as thoughtful as you can be. And you are a light in the world, Lish. :)
Ben
I wrote a comment. I deleted it. I wrote another. Delete. Still another. Delete.
I think I'm ready now.
You saw my responses on your page. My Inner Professor came out. You likely saw my mini-research essay on my own page, in response to an inaccuracy that jerks my chain every time I see it.
But I didn't knee-jerk react. Instead, I got in touch with one of my favorite "mes" -- the student professor -- and wrote something that struck a chord with a lot of people who, because many are my personal friends, I know come from often wildly divergent ideological places. I realized that those Founding Fathers of whom I wrote came from wildly divergent places, too -- and they came together for something far greater than themselves.
Then, everything looked clearer.
I'm glad my friend, Gail, shared this blogpost on Facebook. I find all the anger fascinating too. I try to keep mine in check but am sometimes blindsided by someone else's. I often try to see it from the other person's perspective - even when I believe they are flat out wrong. Seeing that, more often than not, it's coming from some position of fear, it makes me more patient.
Thanks for writing - and I shared a link to my blogpost about the elections in your nifty little box. That was cool too. :)
ah, Lisa-love... the depth of your awareness, practice and transparency about it is what always continues to inspire me most. and that you take it into wild rings of fire to test your edges and grow.
i try to not participate much in the dialogue around politics... i find non-participation to be a place of deep compassion, at times. in issues that fire people up like this, i am reminded of my father... and the day he invited in the conservative Christian Republican who was quite forceful about his views and judgmental about my fathers. Instead of shutting the door on him, my dad invited him in to sit and talk over a cup. They talked a long time - I don't think the fella knew what he was getting into - my dad being a wordy philosophy, religious studies sort of dude. and native american. but they eventually listened to one another, and by the end, they were laughing and warm like old friends.
and i remember my dad coming back in (and having said this many times since, as he told the lesson of that experience to others), and saying that what he learned was that no matter what side of the fence we are on, we have all developed our opinions about the course for the greater good based on the same fundamental desires in life... like the desire to provide for our children, be healthy, have access to help when we need it, the freedom to express and grow into the greatest realization of our selves, have adequate shelter, safety, resources and opportunities... and the deep desires of knowing belonging, joy, ease, lack of fear, and love.
i will never ever forget that. no matter how deeply i disagree with one's opinions about worldly affairs, they are coming from that place of essence. so in those moments of seeming conflict, there is truly the opportunity to invite compassion in and see the other as made of the same stuff. period. it is the moments that create ripples in our souls that eventually make their way out into how this is reflected in the world around us. and they start, just like you *always* so eloquently put, right within you.
i love that you hold space for people to share where they are coming from. i hope gifts like this help others see that we are so much more alike, in the beginning and in the end, than we are different. and that the only power we truly have begins within.