I recently fell in love.
My husband understands. Truth be told, he's hoping this affair might benefit us both.
This love...it's a deep one. She whispered softly to me at first, but now has swept me off my feet, dancing me into new worlds and ways of living.
I don't often refer to her (she's quite shy and fickle, and tends to hide when acknowledged). But today, I make an exception - hoping she'll understand.
The past few days, we have been intimately together. I pick up a brush, she guides its strokes. I begin to ponder, she laughs and cracks a joke. I worry, she smiles. Ah the ways she has of making me disappear into us....
Together, we created this.
The Gift, 11X15, acrylic on watercolor paper
I can do little but wonder at how she moved this through me - and how I allowed myself to get out of her way. So often I want to be the one who creates.
I am perhaps most seduced by the texture. Layers of sensual delights waiting to be explored with eyes or fingers....
...how can I not be drowning in love with the muse that allowed this to be?
I dare not read too much into it lest she scoffs at my attempts and decides to leave. So, taking her lead,
I simply create and experience.
This must be the road less-travelled because yes, it has made all of the difference.
Heart-in-heart I walk with her, down this road away from the leering shoulds and cat-calling fears. Don't think for a minute that I still don't hear them. Don't think for a minute that I don't break away from her every once in awhile to run to them.
But she waits, patiently, knowing that once I have felt the blissful union with her love...I cannot help but return.